Saturday 11 October 2014

Dusty Hope.....

We tend to have people in our lives that tell us what we want to hear, whether good for us or not. I think we are cowards that way. I think we miss so much of who God is and what He wants us to know, when we shut out tough love.

Why do we not allow people, that love us with the bitter truth, to remain?
 It certainly makes me a hypocrite. I am happy to share my wisdom with another and puff up my ego.  But when God uses a dear friend to address a delicate matter, I become offended and distant.

How can that be?

How is it that I can fight for my kids and steer them in the right direction, but refuse that same guidance?  Why is it that I can counsel a friend struggling in marriage but allowed my own to crumble and bitterness seep in?

It has been some time since I have written a blog. The honest truth is that I have been distracted. Distracted with life and the direction it may or may not be heading. Distracted with my own fears and daily battles. Distracted with selfishness and earthly desires.

Where is God in all of this? Is He on the radar? How long have I been so caught up in myself?

 In a world that is so focused on self and immediate satisfaction, it is no wonder people are oozing discontentment. If inwardly directed, discontentment can seem to be temporally extinguished with alcohol, drugs, food or sex. Outwardly, the focus can be on children, a job, society contributions, vanity or an expression of material comforts.

What do I do when those things fall short and no longer satisfy? Where and to whom do I turn?

Do I shut out my spouse and find another? Do I explore career advancement? Do I disconnect from my kids and let them lead their own destructive lives?

Maybe one more drink will help. Maybe a new outfit or if I remodel the kitchen.  All would be well if I could just smother that internal ache, that just won't go away.

Is that the answer? To smother? Or is it to listen? If I am missing something in my life or rather ignoring, then why have I concluded that remaining distracted is the answer?  It must be so, as I seemed to have invited a number of unique and empty distractions into my world.

The hope that something of this world will satisfy me, has left me spinning in circles and now I am discouraged.  Is this where my God wants me? Standing in a cloud of dust?

As the dust starts to settle, it seems that this is in fact where I need to be.  As I quiet my mind and remain still, the swirling slows and I can begin to again see. I can see my Hope. I can feel His love.  He is all that I need in this life. How did I lose that?

Becoming distracted, thus discouraged, was not an over night   process. But the undoing of it was!

If my loss of hope is rooted in discouragement, then how can I be surprised by my state of mind, when my focus has been on temporal things?  It is all right to have desires and pleasures of this life. I believe that God uses the temporal to bless and encourage us.

It is I, that allowed the temporal to take over my focus and somehow adopt an understanding that more is better. Or numb is better. Or that maybe new is better. When all along I forgot that He is better.

 My focus cemented in Gods love and a desire to walk with Him, clears the air, the heart and the mind. It releases the anxiety that shouts, I need to change or fix something.  It soothes the emptiness that stems from loss. It challenges my mind set and encourages a change of behavior and attitude.

Clearly my journey of distractions fell short. My focused energy in finding hope in stuff or people, left me dishearten and discouraged.

Was it worth it? Yes! Because now I know where I don't want to be. I now know where and in whom my hope truly lies.

The dust is continuing to settle. The road is being cleared of debris and I am now standing back by His side. Even though I walked through a thick heavy cloud to get here, there is no other place I would rather be.

Romans 12:12  Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.

 Here is a link to one of my favorite songs by Danny Gokey.  So inspiring!


  1. Well done, Crystal! Very thought-provoking and applicable to all of us.
    Hugs, Ruth

  2. Danny would be proud ;)

  3. I'm on a similar journey. Thanks for sharing. Very encouraging

  4. Thank you for sharing your heart and mind and for your honesty. I missed hearing from you! Tammy


I would love you hear your thoughts! Please feel free to post any comments or questions. Sincerely, Crystal